Abysmal Record: The Catholic Church has failed to behead one heretic this year!

From studying the Catholic Catechism to reading the vaunted words present in the Code of Canon Law to Aquinas's Summa Theologica, there were hours upon hours of Catholic fun in the Elliot household. But nothing ever compared to the fun that we had attending the Church's local beheadings of heretical members!!! 

I even remember a year when everyone was in lock step with Rome which created a deficit in heretics and worried Church elders that they might have to cancel the Christmas Day beheadings. It was horrible! It wasn't until a local priest and faithful member of the Diocesan order, Father Patrick O'Malley, had a remarkably genius idea; have a heretic lottery, that the festivities were saved. It as simple, the first five names drawn would be beheaded. Needless to say we all were eager to participate. Although there were claims of cronyism when the local Monsignor was the first name drawn. I still think the beheading lottery was rigged!!! But all in all, it did work out well, we had a great time and Father O'Malley after the Monsignor's beheading was appointed to the position. 

But I digress...

Now it seems under the inept leadership of Pope Francis,  I report with great sadness that the Catholic Church in its lack of support for "intolerance and extremism" has failed to behead ONE heretic!!! What the hell!!!

From Catholic Vote,

For the most intolerant and extreme religion in the world, this is a rather embarrassing statistic. 

It appears that the Catholic Church, widely recognized as the most uncompromising and dogmatic among the world’s major religions, is about to close out the year without executing a single person. 

As everyone knows, the Catholic Church is a religion of strict doctrine, ruling every aspect of each individual Catholic’s life from the Vatican with an iron fist, while at the same time relentlessly imposing its beliefs on the rest of society. 

Yet for some reason the Catholic Church has had an abysmal year at the chopping block, failing to kill a single one of its billion-plus members for failing to live in strict adherence to her teachings. On top of that, the Vatican has put to death exactly zero people from other religions for refusing to convert to Catholicism. 

Even some followers of Islam, universally known as a religion of peace and tolerance, have found time on the weekends to behead a few non-believers. And yet the Catholic Church, far from resembling anything having to do with peace or tolerance, has taken incompetence to a whole new level when it comes to imposing its beliefs. 

Sure, 2015 is a new year and all, but let’s face it. When it comes to intolerance, we’re pathetic.

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I'm Officially a Right Wing Extremist With a Pedigree

Since I fit about 70-80% DHS profile for a right wing terrorist, minus the racism, religious zealotry, and other assorted kookiness, I was starting to get concerned that I was just in a state of denial about it. So I started looking for a way to confirm it and Reason magazine has so thoughtfully provided a quiz to determine if you fit the bill.

Needless to say, I not only fit the bill, I earned a pedigree.


Click on image to enlarge.

I wonder if this means I will be getting a visit from federal agents soon? Lol.

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Honk If You're Paying My Mortgage!

This was too funny to pass up cause it's true.



The O-budget,



which will lead to,



(H/T to small dead animals for images)

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Inauguration Day Round Up

In the interests of history and brotherhood, we figured we would embrace this monumental day of hope and change by giving a recount of the days events. This is a glimpse of things to come.

It seems even Chief Justice John Roberts got caught up in the hypnotic gaze of the "One." While administering the Oaf of Office to the Messiah, the Chief Justice finally feels the Chris Matthews tingle.

From MSNBC,

ROBERTS: I, Barack Hussein Obama...

OBAMA: I, Barack... (Wonders if he should let the world he is a closet Muslim.)

ROBERTS: ... do solemnly swear...

OBAMA: I, Barack Hussein Obama, do solemnly swear... (Figures screw it, it's too late. Finally admits Muslim heritage.)

ROBERTS: ... that I will execute the office of president to the United States faithfully... (Tingle sets in.)

OBAMA: ... that I will execute... (True intentions are known.)

ROBERTS: ... faithfully the office of president of the United States...

OBAMA: ... the office of president of the United States faithfully...

ROBERTS: ... and will to the best of my ability...

OBAMA: ... and will to the best of my ability... (Doesn't have much.)

ROBERTS: ... preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States.

OBAMA: ... preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States. (More like change, shift, and shape so it suits my needs.)

ROBERTS: So help you God? (Has to remind him he isn't swearing to Allah.)

OBAMA: So help me God. (Suckers!!!!)

ROBERTS: Congratulations, Mr. President. (Feints like a 15 yr girl at a Jonas brothers concert.)

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Bush Mocked As He Arrives on Inauguration Dais

The Hill Blog-The crowd packed on the west side of the Capitol grounds serenaded President Bush in mocking fashion when he took to the inaugural stage alongside Vice President Dick Cheney.

"Nah nah nah nah, hey hey, good-bye," a section of the crowd chanted.

The crowd packed immediately below the podium received Bush in stony silence when he took his seat on the stage surrounding the podium where Barack Obama was scheduled to take the oath office to become the 44th president of the United States. read more...

Great to see that Liberals are still a class act, they haven't disappointed yet. You can't accuse them of not being inconsistent.
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Carter 'Snubs' Clinton?

ABC-ABC News' David Wright reports: Today may be a day when the nation briefly sets aside partisan enmity for the peaceful transition of power, but personal enmity? That’s another matter.

One small example: as the ex-Presidents gathered in the crypt of the Capitol preparing to head out to the platform, a chilly day got a bit chillier as the Carters and the Clintons were forced to occupy the same cramped space.

Former Democratic President Jimmy Carter appeared to greet former Republican President George H.W. Bush and his wife warmly, kissing Barbara Bush on the cheek. But as Carter passed fellow Democrats Bill and Hillary Clinton, the two men did not appear to acknowledge each others presence at all. read more...

When Jimmy Carter starts picking on you, you know you have lost all your political capital. This is like the former starting QB getting kicked around by the high school science nerd.

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Clinton and Cornyn wrangle in Rotunda

The Politico-Hillary Clinton and John Cornyn, who's delaying her floor confirmation vote, have been having a fairly heated (that is to say, intense but cordial) discussion just out of earshot under the Washington statue in the rotunda. Lots of hand gestures, back and forth and her squeezing his forearm. read more...

It was later reported that Hillary had to be held back by Bill, while shouting, "You remember Vince Foster, don't you?!?!? Yeah, look what happened to him! I better be confirmed by tomorrow!"
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It's ashame that silliness like, most of this is, was gong on behind the scenes on such a truly historic day. Seems like you can "hope" all you want for "change," but, the more things change the more they stay the same.

Please, feel free to leave some commentary at the bottom of the page. We appreciate your thoughts.

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Rod "Baretta" Blagojevich

What I have uncovered about Blagojevich is going to shake the United States to its core. I have been mulling over whether or not to release this information due to the destruction this will cause our country. But, in the end I figured everyone had a right to know, regardless of the consequences.


Rod Blagojevich is really Robert Blake of Baretta fame. For those too young to remember, Barreta was a detective series which ran from 1975 to 1978 on ABC.




Please, feel free to leave some commentary at the bottom of the page. We appreciate your thoughts.

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NewsBuster's Comedy

Daily comedy from Newsbusters: Taking shots at the President-elect, Rino at large John McCain, and others.




Please, feel free to leave some commentary at the bottom of the page. We appreciate your thoughts.

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News Busters Comedy

News busters takes some shots at President-elect Obama, Michael Moore, the networks, and Joan Rivers. Pretty funny stuff.






Video credit to News Busters.

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Biden has Definitely Fired Up the Ole' Gaffe-O-Mattic

CT

With all this seriousness going on around Opie and I have come up with two or three topics, on the lighter side, to keep things humorous and in perspective. Besides there is nothing newsworthy going on, somebody said something about some $700 billion Wall Street bail out and John McCain suspending his candidacy for the Presidency. Right now these are just rumors(being sarcastic), so we are going to bring you something really news worthy courtesy of Joe Biden.

I don't dislike Joey, he is a devoted family man and devoted Senator, can't stand his politics though. What I love most about him is the constant foot-in-mouth disease he suffers from. God, how could you ask for any better, here is a list of the most recent and growing list.

Biden on an ad the Obama campaign was running concerning John McCain.

-"I thought that was terrible, by the way. I didn't know we did it and if I had anything to do with it, we'd have never done it," he told the CBS “Evening News” in reference to this Obama-Biden ad. [1]

On his Congressional trip to Afghanistan.

-"If you want to know where Al Qaeda lives, you want to know where Bin Laden is, come back to Afghanistan with me. ... Come back to the area where my helicopter was forced down, with a three-star general and three senators at 10,500 feet in the middle of those mountains. I can tell you where they are," he said to the National Guard Association. (According to ABC News, Biden's helicopter was forced down by a snowstorm). [1]

Speaking about the economic meltdown.

-“When the stock market crashed, Franklin Roosevelt got on the television and didn’t just talk about the princes of greed,” Biden told Couric. “He said, ‘Look, here’s what happened." [2]

Problem is Hoover was President when the stock market crashed and there was no television.

Joe on rich folks paying more taxes to help get the country out of the rut, lol.

-Biden said: "It's time to be patriotic ... time to jump in, time to be part of the deal, time to help get America out of the rut." [3]

Biden on coal usage.

-"We're not supporting 'clean coal.' [4]

Now keep in mind two things: 1) Biden is from Pennsylvania, where coal mining is big business. 2) Obama supports clean coal initiatives.

Biden on diplomatic initiatives with Iran.

-After seven years, in which our senior diplomatic personnel were not allowed to make a single contact with Iranians, the Bush administration realized the absurdity of its own policy and sent our leading diplomat to Iran,” he said. “The Assistant Secretary of State as he went to Tehran, sat down at the instruction of the President of the United States. [5]

Keep in mind that the Democrats, Obama included, have long stated and criticized the President for using "cowboy diplomacy" especially with Iran. When he opens the door, they slam it in his face.

Gaffe cred to 30yrdem-not any more.

I am sure there will be more and if there are any I overlooked please make note in the comments box and I will add them to the list. This was just to funny to pass up.

[1] Biden Gaffe-o-meter
[2] Biden on FDR’s management of the 1929 crash
[3] Biden calls paying higher taxes a patriotic act
[4] Biden: 'No coal plants here in America'
[5] Biden Fact Check: No US Diplomats In Tehran

Gaffe-o-meter credit to Stokley Baksh at the Plank

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Newsflash: Al Gore to travel to sun to address issue of Helio Cooling with Sun's inhabitants!

Pundit,


I am afraid I have some really bad news for the earthbound peasant class. Al Gore and the IEA have just announced in a press release that the sun is cooling and it is becuse of the usage of SUV's on Earth, just the idea of drilling offhsore, and the Sun's inahbitants continual usage of ice cubes in their beverages. (I didn't know anyone could live on the Sun.)

The intensity of the sun's million-mile-per-hour solar wind has dropped to its lowest levels since accurate records began half a century ago, scientists say. [1]

Gore has stated that the same technology that he used to create the interent and give Joe Biden the ability to time travel, which he used to bring television back to FDR and Hoover, will be used to create a space ship with faster than light capabilites. He will use it to travel to the Sun and tediously scold the population about the dangers of Helio Cooling and show them how it is their fault, as well as ours.

We wish Gore and his crew, the best a brightest humanity has to offer pictured here: 30 Dumbest People in Hollywood, the best of luck on their trip to the Sun. This should be interesting.

-OmegaPundit

"The last word on everything."

[1] Solar wind weakest since beginning of space age


The above article is pretty cool, if you are into the science end of things.

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