Newsflash: Al Gore to travel to sun to address issue of Helio Cooling with Sun's inhabitants!


I am afraid I have some really bad news for the earthbound peasant class. Al Gore and the IEA have just announced in a press release that the sun is cooling and it is becuse of the usage of SUV's on Earth, just the idea of drilling offhsore, and the Sun's inahbitants continual usage of ice cubes in their beverages. (I didn't know anyone could live on the Sun.)
The intensity of the sun's million-mile-per-hour solar wind has dropped to its lowest levels since accurate records began half a century ago, scientists say. [1]

Gore has stated that the same technology that he used to create the interent and give Joe Biden the ability to time travel, which he used to bring television back to FDR and Hoover, will be used to create a space ship with faster than light capabilites. He will use it to travel to the Sun and tediously scold the population about the dangers of Helio Cooling and show them how it is their fault, as well as ours.

We wish Gore and his crew, the best a brightest humanity has to offer pictured here: 30 Dumbest People in Hollywood, the best of luck on their trip to the Sun. This should be interesting.


"The last word on everything."

[1] Solar wind weakest since beginning of space age

The above article is pretty cool, if you are into the science end of things.



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